ACT I: Language Barrier

Scene 1: Heechul
Heechul seriously considered learning Chinese. He’s a practical soul, you understand, and it would be much easier to speak the same language as one’s roommate instead of their current system of simple phrases and complicated hand gestures. He wouldn’t dream of learning any flowery poetic phrases, of course, he doesn’t need that to impress; he just wants to make things simple for himself. Heechul is all about keeping things simple.

That’s why he spends so much time talking to Hankyung—the poor idiot needs so much practice, his Korean is hopeless—and he always speaks for Hankyung in public. The Chinese boy just has to smile and nod, say a few key words and Heechul will cover the rest with witty phrases and silly jokes. Hankyung’s the face, he’s the voice. And it’s not because he’s not pretty; everyone knows Kim Heechul is prettier than most of the girls, not to mention the boys. But no matter how pretty Heechul looks, he doesn’t attract the swoons and dreamy stares that the girls give Hankyung.

Maybe it’s the eyes, he thinks. Hankyung uses that intense stare and the girls eat it up. Or maybe it’s the way he dances, all fire and silk and perfect rhythm. No, he thinks, it’s got to be the smile, the one that’s all sugar on the surface and bedroom whispers underneath. Of course this is all hearsay, Heechul says in public. I hear these things and I’m proud of my band member, even if he can’t be as pretty as me, Heechul says with a smirk. But at home he stares in the mirror and practices that same stare and wonders why it’s not the same.

Heechul didn’t learn Chinese because Shiwon did it first and Heechul will never, never be seen as a copycat. Shiwon has an annoying habit of ruining Heechul’s well-laid plans. Kim Heechul was going to be known as the pretty one, but then Shiwon had to come along with his perfect movie-star looks. Shiwon was the one who modeled first, the one who acted in a major movie first. Heechul was shunted aside to radio and talk shows, emceeing for other artists while he watched the stage. Kim Heechul was funny, but everyone turned to Shiwon and his sweet “gentlemanly” manners. Plus he always felt so short whenever he stood next to the younger boy and Shiwon always tried to apologize for everything. If you were really sorry you wouldn’t have screwed up in the first place, Heechul says angrily. Why don’t you get it right for once? And even though he turns to leave, he can hear Shiwon shuffling his feet in apology and it makes him angrier. Shiwon ruined everything.

Scene 2: Shiwon
Shiwon has trouble with his pronunciation. Chinese comes with these terribly confusing tones—they never come out right, and Shiwon wants so badly for it to be right. He wants it to be perfect, hear smooth syllables roll out of his mouth like they do in Andy Lau’s movies. His own Chinese is so choppy, so many awkward accents and wrong emphases. What he really needs, he thinks, is more practice.

Then Hankyung joined SM and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. The new guy definitely needed to practice Korean and he needed to practice Chinese; he couldn’t image a more perfect study partner. So they spend hours and hours talking, he speaking in Chinese, Hankyung in Korean. Both of them stutter, stumble, trip over their own tongues, but it always sounds comfortable, sounds familiar, sounds like home. They laugh at each other: your r’s sound funny, Hankyung says, and your vowels are all weird, says Shiwon. But they keep talking.

They talk about everything. Dance practice, and how that new step is so hard (but Hankyung’s already perfected it, Siwon knows—he’s seen him practicing.) Music lessons, voice training, drama among the members (Jungsu hyung and Yongwoon hyung are fighting again, and Ryeowook got himself stuck in the middle, poor guy.) They talk about Seoul, how it’s different from home. Shiwon tries not to talk about home, because Hankyung gets moody and silent when he brings it up, and he reaches out desperately for another subject because nothing is worse than watching Hankyung’s eyes turn cold and dark.

Hankyung suggests that they talk over dinner sometime and a one-time suggestions turns into a habit. They go out as often as they can, with other members or without, but always both of them together. They go to Korean restaurants, Western, strange exotic places, but very few Chinese because none of them taste right, Hankyung complains. Shiwon can’t quite tell the difference himself but he knows that none of them taste as good as Hankyung’s fried rice.

They laugh at the unusual flavors, the strange ingredients. They make faces at each other behind hands and napkins, and Shiwon wonders how it would taste to lick the chili sauce directly off Hankyung’s lips. It would taste like fire, he thinks. Fiery and silky smooth. Hankyung grins and steals Shiwon’s napkin to wipe it off. And through it all they keep talking; about their upcoming debut, about the interview next week, the awful performance yesterday where Hankyung missed a step and Shiwon forgot to smile, about crazy fans and company rumors. Shiwon knows the words aren’t important; what matters is the lilt of Hankyung’s voice.

Scene 3: Hankyung
When Han Geng was small he dreamed of being an astronaut. He played in make-believe rockets and imagined himself floating alongside stars, landing on distant planets and meeting the aliens. When he first lands in Korea he feels as though he might as well be on Mars; everything is so different he hardly knows where to start looking. He doesn’t know how to speak Korean so he doesn’t speak at all; he develops his “silent and mysterious” reputation completely by accident. Luckily movement is universal and Han Geng throws himself into his dancing. At least in the studio he doesn’t have to talk, just turn here, step there.

The dance studio feels safe, safe enough to look around instead of staring at his feet, and Han Geng immediately notices that some people don’t really belong at this level. The tall one with the handsome face doesn’t know what to do with his limbs and the shorter one who’s pretty as a girl refuses to put the effort into dancing properly. Briefly he wonders if looking beautiful means you’re an awful dancer. Eventually he learns their names: tall and handsome is Shiwon, shorter and pretty is Heechul. Shiwon approaches him one day in broken Chinese—I have a proposition for you, he says, and shuffles his feet. Hankyung agrees to the extra language practice; heaven knows they both need it.

Shiwon never laughs at his bad pronunciation, his limited vocabulary, his inherent failure to understand the grammar. Shiwon teaches him how to recognize different accents—Yunho’s Gwanju accent, Heechul’s satoori—and offers him encouragement when the teachers have been hard on him. In turn he teaches Shiwon how to curse properly and tries to suppress his Heilongjiang accent. They start practicing between lessons, over dinner, and Han Geng feels like Shiwon understands him best.

His debut couldn’t come fast enough, even if it’s with a bunch of people he doesn’t really know, but at least he has Shiwon. He smiles and nods on TV and concentrates on his dancing, because at least when he dances people don’t ask him questions that he doesn’t know how to answer. When the members move into their new apartments Hankyung’s new roommate is Heechul, who talks loudly and laughs at his own inability to dance. Heechul is never awkward though, Han Geng notices; he may not be able to keep the proper rhythm but he always moves exactly the way he wants to. Heechul isn’t afraid to laugh at him. You need help, kid, Heechul says, and when Han Geng protests that he’s not a kid Heechul just laughs louder. Don’t worry, he says, I won’t let you embarrass the group.

Heechul always has more to say than anyone has time to listen to and Han Geng is more than happy to let him do the talking. Our Hankyung is such a good dancer, and so handsome, Heechul says, and he’s so convincing that Han Geng almost forgets that it’s just for promotion. Heechul teaches him to mix drinks and takes him out to the bars until both of them can barely stand, let alone walk back to the dorm.

Han Geng finds that he now refers to himself in Korean, as Hankyung, who feels like an entirely different person from the Han Geng who flew here years ago. He’s learned the language, gotten used to the food, made new friends. He shares his jokes with Heechul and his secrets with Shiwon and he can’t decide which is more important.

ACT II: Rumors
Scene 1: Hankyung
Heechul is like the weather, Hankyung thinks. He blows hot and cold in an instant and there’s no predicting when the sky will turn color and dump Heechul’s highly impressive wrath upon them all. In fact, he’s come to expect the unexpected. So when Heechul shows up in the kitchen wearing one of his infamous pouts, Hankyung knows that whatever it is, Kim Heechul will not let him off until it’s been said and apologized for.

You and Shiwon are getting pretty cozy these days, Heechul says.
Hankyung shrugs.
Rumor says you two are getting more than cozy, Heechul says. Rumor says it’s getting pretty hot.
Hankyung stares at his hyung blankly. Heechul should know better than to believe every rumor he hears, but Heechul’s careful indifference is quickly turning ugly. Hankyung tries to protest but Heechul cuts him off.
Don’t you think you’re behaving rather badly? Heechul asks. If people are noticing, then…his voice trails off but his eyes flash lightning.
I haven’t heard anything, Hankyung says. He regrets his words immediately, as Heechul clearly doesn’t want to hear it.
Who tells you anything, huh? Heechul demands. I’ve been around longer, I know everyone and I hear everything. People always tell me what’s going on, and just under the surface Hankyung hears except you, you don’t tell me anything. God, you never pay attention, Heechul says, what’s going to happen if this gets outside of the company and into public hands, huh? Can’t you at least be careful about who you fuck?
Hankyung, wide eyed, denies it. Hyung, he says, you know how rumors come from nowhere.
It’s not a rumor if I’ve seen you, Heechul hisses.
Hankyung is really lost now. Seen them? At dinner, during practice? Doing what? But hyung, he says, visibly confused, we asked if you wanted to come to dinner with us, I don’t know what you’re talking about—
Don’t you fucking lie to me, China boy, Heechul growls, and Hankyung’s spine stiffens.
You’re being unreasonable, Heechul, he says.
Heechul gapes at him for a moment. Unreasonable? He gasps. Of all the things to say, he had to pick unreasonable? Heechul is silent for a moment. Fine, he hisses, and leaves the kitchen. Hankyung goes back to washing the dishes and wonders who Heechul has been talking to.

Scene 2: Shiwon
Shiwon has never really lived with Heechul and thus doesn’t know how to weather Heechul’s mercurial moods. He’s on his way home one night after rehearsal when Heechul catches up to him in the stairwell.

Proud of yourself, I bet, Heechul says.
Shiwon turns around and Heechul is leaning against the railing, face carefully blank. What do you mean, hyung? Shiwon asks.
Don’t play innocent with me, Heechul says. I know what you’re up to with Hankyung.
Shiwon knows a blush is creeping up his cheeks, but he says quietly, Hankyung and I haven’t done anything. I think he’s waiting for someone else, he wants to say, but he’s not brave enough. Aloud he says, you shouldn’t listen to rumors, hyung.
Heechul laughs, but his eyes are cold. You shouldn’t start them, dongsaeng, he says. He walks down the few steps and stands directly in front of Shiwon, inches between their faces. Keep your hands to yourself, he hisses.
Shiwon flinches. I am keeping my hands to myself, he says coldly, even though his heart is pounding. Not that it’s any of your business anyways. Heechul’s grin shows all of his teeth. The band’s business is my business, he says. I can’t have you two dragging down our reputation.
Shiwon has no idea where he’s getting all this nerve from, but he decides to use it before it goes away again. Look who’s talking, hyung, he says quietly. Last I check I’m not the one attracting all the antis.
A hand flies and Shiwon clutches at his face, more out of shock than pain. Heechul seems so much taller now, so much…bigger, and Shiwon has already lost his nerve.
Watch your mouth, Heechul growls, and watch your hands too. Abruptly he leaves, and Shiwon is left standing alone on the steps with red finger-shaped marks on his left cheek. Briefly he is disappointed that he isn’t getting what the rumors say he is but he quickly squashes that thought. If he starts thinking about Hankyung now, Heechul really will kill him. As he walks him he wonders why Heechul is so worked up about Hankyung anyways.

Scene 3: Heechul
No one touches what Kim Heechul wants, and anyone who does is headed directly for a dark and fiery death. Heechul was fairly sure everyone knew this already, but apparently Siwon had to be reminded. He’s confident that things will go as they should now, when Hankyung corners him before a performance.

Why did you hit Shiwon, he asks directly. There’s no trace of his usual easy smile and Heechul’s never seen him look so serious.
Heechul plays at nonchalance. He was getting on my nerves, he says, and he crossed the line last night. It’s not my fault, he really needs to learn to be more polite to his hyungs—
Don’t lie, Hankyung says sharply. Why did you hit him?

Heechul looks directly into Hankyung’s face and he realizes that the steel in Hankyung’s eyes is meant for him. His stomach knots a little; he always feels so guilty whenever he upsets Hankyung. Still, he’s hardly about to back down now.
He got between me and what I want, Heechul says simply.
Now it’s Hankyung’s turn to look confused. So you had to hit him for it?
I had to make a point, Heechul says, staring directly into Hankyung’s eyes until the other boy looks away first.
Oh, Hankyung answers softly, and goes quiet. Heechul is about to leave when Hankyung says, so what did you want?
Hankyung looks awkward and naïve, and Heechul wants to yell at him for trying to look cute but he knows Hankyung isn’t doing it on purpose. Instead he moves in closer, closer, until Hankyung’s face is a breath away from his and he can hear both their heartbeats pounding in an irregular rhythm. He leans forward and brushes his lips lightly against Hankyung’s, leaving a trace of gloss.
That’s what I wanted, Heechul says, and smiles smugly.
Hankyung freezes and instead of responding, he stumbles backwards and abruptly leaves, disappearing into the crowd of members and staff and crew. Heechul stands alone for a few moments, unsure for once. Briefly he considers the possibility that Hankyung might not return his feelings but he squashes that thought with violent force. Of course Hankyung prefers him, he was Kim Heechul.

Suddenly being Kim Heechul didn’t seem like such a great thing.

Scene 4: Hankyung
Hankyung avoids Heechul for several days, tiptoeing around the apartment and avoiding his gaze during rehearsals. At least their schedules are so busy that they hardly run into each other, and Hankyung gratefully takes refuge in Shiwon’s sympathetic company. They go out for dinner and talk about Yesung’s new car, and Hankyung convinces Shiwon to try the new computer game that he and Kibum have been playing all week.

They’re laughing as they reach the front door of the apartment, Shiwon telling some outrageous story about Eunhyuk stealing Donghae’s boxers and displaying them in the office—and he knew So Nyuh Shi Dae was practicing in there that day, Shiwon grins—when the smell of alcohol hits them. Kibum and Jay are both off filming for a few days, he knows, so it must be Heechul.

Instead of turning on the light he turns on a desk lamp and as he suspected, Heechul is sprawled against the couch with a bottle of soju in his hand. The mess on the table indicates that this is not his first bottle, and the unopened ones on the ground imply that he doesn’t intend it to be his last. Heechul’s eyes are waxy and his limbs are limp. Hankyung-ah, is that you? he asks. His voice is thick, the words heavy on his tongue.

Hankyung tells Heechul to wait, he’ll be right back and he rushes back to the door where Shiwon has been waiting timidly, ostensibly hiding from Heechul. Shiwon leaves with the briefest of goodbyes and a sympathetic pat on the shoulder, and Hankyung inwardly prepares to battle with the very-inebriated Heechul.

Heechul is so drunk that he’s already passed his usual loud and boisterous phase, where he crashes around and sings at the top of his lungs. Now he’s slow and sluggish, and it is with great difficulty that Hankyung finally manages to drag Heechul into his bed. He throws a blanket over his hyung and turns to leave but a hand catches his wrist, and in moments Heechul has yanked him off his feet and onto the bed.

Heechul is warm, too warm, and his arms are preposterously strong. Stay with me, Hankyung-ah, he says. You smell nice.
Hankyung nearly suffocates in the soju-laced air. I can’t, he says. I have to go, you have to let go of me.
Am not, Heechul says, and somehow Heechul’s arms have tightened. Stay with me, I like you.
Hankyung freezes.
I do, Hankyung, I do, I like you, Heechul repeats. You’re so pretty, you’re almost as pretty as me, he says, punctuated by hiccups.
Okay, I’ll stay, Hankyung says, desperation coloring his voice. But you have to let go of me, you’re holding on too tight.
Don’t wanna, Heechul says, and snuggles into Hankyung’s neck. Wanna keep you.
All the blood in Hankyung’s body is rushing incredibly quickly, and all of it seems to have left his brain and headed south. You have to let go, he says, but his voice is breathy, with an embarrassing squeak. His hands float nervously over Heechul’s body, not sure where to land.
Heechul clutches at Hankyung none-too-gently and Hankyung lets out a very undignified squeak when Heechul’s hands find their way under his clothes. He starts to leave a trail of sloppy kisses on Hankyung’s neck. Hankyung squirms uselessly—he knows he needs to run but he’s never done this before and he suddenly wishes he were drunk so he wouldn’t have to think at all and could just enjoy what Heechul is doing and oh god—

Too soon the hands relax, the mouth stops, and Heechul’s body starts to go limp. Hankyung doesn’t move, partially afraid of what Heechul might do next and partially disappointed that Heechul’s not moving. He shifts slightly and realizes that Heechul has inexplicably fallen asleep; apparently seduction while intoxicated is very tiring work. Slowly he extricates himself from the tangled mess that is Heechul’s bed and escapes to the living room, where he falls exhausted onto the couch. When he falls asleep, he dreams of hot mouths and clever hands.

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